Herx and more herx and more herx

It has been a while since I have blogged about my recovery. Starting from the end of April until today it has been a rollercoaster ride of herx reactions. I had a couple of weeks off from herxing long enough to catch my breathe. The herx reaction I had in April was pure physical pain. My life consisted of me wearing sunglasses in the dark, laying on the coach hating life. My neck specifically hurt so much I could not bare it. Headaches who tough as was the nausea that accompanied it. every joint in my body hurt. The extreme fatigue was demoralizing and scary. I used to have so much energy and was active in my life and now my life is nothing more than fatigue/exhaustion, physical pain and a rollercoaster of emotions - a mostly permanent state of PMS. By mid June I was starting to feel better just in time to start my new round of antibiotics - by that I mean my LLMD changed my meds. When I had my doctor's appointment, my LLMD appologised three times to me about the herx reaction these new meds will put me through. I figured it was going to be more physical pain like in April. Surprise! Surprise! The physical pain was minimal in contrast to the emotional hell I went through. I would spend my days and nights just crying, I would stop long enough to catch my breathe and then came another flood of tears. I was upset about everything. I would not call it a depression because depressed people have a reason to be depressed. I had no reason to be depressed yet I felt so bad. It was an exaggerated pity party with no end in sight. But the end did come, eventually. Now I am over the worst of it - emotionally. Physically my symptoms are subsiding from the herx flare up and I started doing yoga again as of last week. I order from PBS a yoga DVD- Easy Yoga for Easing Pain. My LLMD said it would be okay to try it. I did like it. I used to do an hour and a half of hot yoga before Lyme disease but now that would be a little too ambitious for me. The DVD is about an hour and it was okay. I did not push myself. My muscles were sensitive to it so I took it slowly. It did tire me out and it took a couple of days to regain my strength. I hate being fatigued. I will try to do it twice this week. Increase it by one work out a week. Fatigue sucks because for me it also bring along brain fog. I hate it when my intelligence does not work at the level I like it to. My mind would fire on all cylinders as would my body but now it does not. It frustrates me. It makes me sad. I want my life back. The life that was full of promise and fun not meds and pain. I know I am getting better but I am impatient for this chapter of my life to be closed and I am eager for the good times to begin. Until next time- stay tick free and toodles for now.